July 7, 2006

The Order of the Purple Tomato

Posted in Humour, Personal at 11:53 am by falstaff

On the morning of 7th July, 2006, while engaged in vicious hand to hand combat with a particularly recalcitrant cabbage, Field Housewife D.W. Falstaff suffered grevious injury to the cuticle of his left middle finger. Despite being severely disabled and suffering heavy loss of blood, Field Housewife Falstaff continued to engage with the enemy, who eventually succumbed. Field Housewife Falstaff then went on to set a glorious example to his other fingers by further attacking, peeling and eventually destroying two potatoes, a bunch of beans and one particularly devastating onion that had eluded capture for weeks. For his gallantry, his courage around the kitchen fire, and for service above and beyond the call of subzi, Field Housewife Falstaff is post-prandially awarded the Order of the Purple Tomato.

*Applause*

Translation: I cut my finger chopping vegetables this morning and am trying to go easy on the typing. So more later.

P.S. : And then people say that women shouldn’t be given hazardous front-line roles.

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July 4, 2006

Further evidence that my life is a joke

Posted in Humour, Personal at 3:11 pm by falstaff

One of my closest friends is getting married. I decide to write her a poem for the occasion. Casting about for a suitable metaphor, I come up with the idea of comparing the months leading up to the wedding to a river. I pack in a whole bunch of water images – talk about springs, and streams, and rivers and waves, etc. etc.

So what happens? Bombay, where my friend lives and is getting married, gets flooded. What’s the bet that she’s going to appreciate a poem that compares her wedding to large, flowing body of water now?

Gah!